This Shouldn't Take Long

Every project leads to a subproject

We live in a 104-year-old house in southeast Wisconsin. When we bought it in 1994, it was planned to be our “starter home.” It has since turned into our “ender home,” it seems. Where those 32 years went, I have no clue, but here we are.

Sweat Equity

If you own, or ever have owned, a house that is over a hundred years old, you know that the project list is never ending and often involves a little crisis triage. The roof leak means we can’t fix the plaster damage until we get a new roof. (Ca-ching!) Resurfacing the floors is too expensive, so we cover them with carpet. (Ca-ching!) It is ongoing forever, and fairly exhausting.

Our kitchen shortly after moving in. Gah!

After our kids both moved out and we started to become flush again, we began upgrades toward the home we always wanted. We ripped out the ratty carpet, much of it stained or tainted with deeply embedded hair from our loving dog and cats over the years. We found the maple floors underneath were beautiful and wondered why we had ever carpeted in the first place. It was a money thing at the time, that’s why.

Of course, before the floors were done, we needed to paint each room. This is called a sub-project. Or maybe Phase I of a larger project. When the walls and floors were done, it required new throw rugs, some new furniture, window coverings, artwork and plants. I guess you’d call these Phases II through VI. In some ways they are the expensive part of the project. I’m a person that thinks that it’ll be so nice when the floors are finally done, but fails to understand that it is only the beginning to a very long, resounding, ca-ching!

Spend it or die with it

After I retired, we decided to take on some larger projects using our “nest egg” for improvements to our century-old nest. We had a contractor install central air after sweating it out with a pair of window air conditioners for thirty-plus years. People wonder how we did without it for so long. My answer remains the same. It was a money thing at the time, that’s why.

Upstairs bedroom after move in. Bedroom pegboard? Egads!

Another inconvenience of our old home is the single, second-floor bathroom. Both of us grew up in homes with a single bath, so it didn’t seem like a big deal to us as young first-time homebuyers in 1994. As we position ourselves for what our next living arrangement will be, the bathroom sits as one of the biggest needs right now. Along with the kitchen, both are in need of complete renovations. Our saving grace for years was a backup toilet in the basement that was a lifesaver in several cases over the years. When you gotta go…

Which brings me to our current projects in progress. A while back the “backup toilet” began running constantly. It was an old 5 gallon toilet that I’d meant to upgrade for years but never did because, It was a money thing at the time, that’s why. I thought I’d take the cheap route and fix the toilet by replacing the innards of it. I’d done it for our upstairs toilet on a couple of occasions, so figured it would be a snap. After some coarse language from a tall DIY home repairman working in a small, confined space, the tank still had a very slow drip to it. So I reassembled the innards and reattached the tank, and it still leaked. Frustrated, I figured we could live with it until we hired a plumber to replace it with a water-efficient model.

When it drips it pours

To ramp up the list of “items to be addressed at a later date,” our shower has also developed a drip of its own. The hot/cold “mixer” is not closing all the way, so it’s dripping at a rate that begs attention. It’s become alarming given the huge increase in water costs after Waukesha started drawing its water from Lake Michigan. A dripping faucet is nothing to dismiss. Having two of them is a cry for help. Money down the drain, quite literally.

Now, to be honest, when we were struggling homeowners, I replaced both our upstairs toilet and our shower mixer. The toilet replacement was an unsavory project which involved re-seating the toilet several times because I thought the wax ring was leaking. It turned out it was a tank leak that just needed tightening. The shower mixer was an hour job that involved shutting off the water and a fair amount of language rated for mature audiences.

Anyway, I did it and it worked. That was then, and largely, It was a money thing at the time, that’s why. I’ve always said that I’m not a handy guy. Despite my lack of confidence in home improvement, I’ve managed pretty well and have learned a lot along the way. I guess I get a sense of satisfaction out of doing home projects, but frankly, I’d rather get that satisfaction by other means.

Living room floors after refinishing

But enough is enough. In my retirement I’ve been able to say, “Let a professional do it,” largely because, for the first time in my life, I can afford it. I have more money than time, or in this case more money than DIY mojo. I’ve been at this home improvement thing for over 30 years and I know that every project spawns a new sub-project. These offshoots often entail watching a YouTube video and taking a trip to Menards, the hardware store, or both.

Help is on the way

So I called our local plumber and told them I needed both the shower mixer replaced and a high-efficiency toilet installed that I bought at Home Despot. I will remove the old toilet to save a little “labor charge,” but that’s where I stop. I consider calling in the professionals my part to keep the local trades economy strong. Hell, I might even tip the guy!

To add to the list, today we are having the “floor guys” come to measure the dining room for a new floating floor. Again, this is a job my son offered to help me with, but I just want it done, especially if it doesn’t involve me using kneepads and walking lame for two days afterwards. Remember, I have more money than motivation. That doesn’t mean I don’t have some plaster work and painting to do before they install the new floor.

There’s that subproject thing again.